Take Me To Your Leader

Breaking news!

Have aliens from outer space landed in America and paid us a visit?  A highly anticipated, congressionally mandated Pentagon report came out on Friday.  It claims there is no evidence that any extraterrestrials have walked amongst us.  

Whew!  

But I started thinking.  What if someone from outer space, a martian, let’s say, did land here and said, take me to your leader?

Well, for one thing, her spaceship wouldn’t have much trouble dodging our air defense systems.  It would simply disguise itself as a Chinese spy balloon.  Or, he would just park their rocket on the other side of Laredo, Texas, or Derby, Vermont and assuming martians have legs (yes, I know what happens when you assume), they could just walk across the border, just like millions of earthlings.

But which leader would our space traveler demand to see and what would it come away with?

Let’s start with President Joe Biden.  

Our outer space migrant would probably begin by asking why he won’t  help American cities that are being financially and socially crushed by the arrival of hundreds of thousands of illegal migrants?  Why some, in the Democrat mainstream media, think the issue of illegal immigration only concerns racists and xenophobes?  On another subject, what would his father, Joe Sr., from scrappy Scranton, PA, think of the DEI policies his son supports?

I will give our alien credit for actually getting to ask the president any questions at all, since a Biden news conference is as rare as a total solar eclipse.  In the past 100 years, only Richard Nixon and Ronald Reagan evaded press questions as much as Biden. 

Apparently, Joe Biden cannot articulate why a majority of the American people believe the country is headed in the wrong direction.  He can only perform a highly rehearsed, highly scripted speech in a controlled setting, that is offered up as proof he’s not the auditioning for Weekend at Bernie’s part III.

Leaving 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, our favorite martian might ask to be taken to the leader of the Republicans, to the man who improbably launched himself into the political stratosphere by descending on an escalator, and who has been hovering over us for eight years, sorta like a death star. 

He could ask Donald J. Trump why he is so enamored with the dictator and murderer Vladimir Putin?  Why he spent like a drunken Democrat when he was President?  Why he didn’t get the border wall built when his party controlled the House and the Senate?  Why he belittles and insults people who disagree with him?  Why is he so proud of the Proud Boys?

I think our intergalactic friend, after having spent time with the two men vying for President of the United States of America, would be ready to shoot himself with its ray gun.  If martians have emotions, and I suspect they may, she would be petrified that one of these two guys will end up in the White House, again.

Honestly, our visitor from Mars could ask to be taken to any leader in any of the 50 states and be hard pressed to find one.

Governor Kathy Hochul in New York?  She is so farmisht (that’s martian for her head is up her ass), she now has the National Guard checking subway riders for weapons.  What does that say about the safety of the system?  The subways are so dangerous, so open to violent crime, we need the military to check our bags before we board?  That’s just great.

Here’s a novel idea that a real leader would embrace.  How about putting criminals in jail, especially the recidivists, instead of setting them free to prey on innocent, hard-working citizens that must use public transportation to get to work?

While in New York, our visitor could stop at Columbia University, and spend some time with the leader of its antisemitism task force.  It would learn about the 24-page report that was issued this past week that found Jewish students at Columbia are in “isolation and pain” because the spineless leaders at the university aren’t enforcing their own rules to crack down on hate-filled, unauthorized demonstrations.  That Jewish students feel threatened, subjected to chants at protests like “Globalize the Intifada” and “Death to the Zionist State.”

What if our space traveler visited the justices of the Alabama Supreme Court?  The ones that ruled frozen embryos are legally protected children, effectively cutting off in-vitro fertilization for Alabama residents.  That decision was cruel and it was as stupid as thinking the moon is made of green cheese.

Need I go on?

We are so lost in space, so leaderless, and that’s no science fiction.  Our choices for president are like dying stars and we are looking at a black hole for another four years.  

Many of our local legislatures are ruled by far out politicians who’ve put their spaced out ideologies ahead of public safety.  Our institutions of higher learning, our corporations, our medical centers and our media, have become planets ruled by special interests, and exclusionary social movements.

If I were that martian, I would get back on my spaceship and blast the hell out of here at warp speed, giving it all she’s got.  And I would look back down at this planet and wonder, what was I thinking, asking to be taken to America’s leader?  

I’d open my ship’s hailing frequency and send this message:  Let me know when you find a real leader and I’ll come back down for another visit.  But right now that looks to be light years away.